One of the things I learned that I dreaded the most with three boys was potty training. I think if we had not had such busy lives, it would have seemed easier, however, that was not the case for us. Back when we were younger, one would go to church on Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night. As our family grew, we had to also work around ball park games and practices. Have you ever seen the restrooms at most of those places? They are not exactly the cleanest bathrooms for either going to the restroom or for cleaning up mishaps. I stressed so much during this season of child rearing that I found myself saying, Lord, if you will help me get through this one more time, I promise there will not be another time You will have to help me in this area.
Now I laugh at that statement because I found myself taking care of three of my grand babies. I had them throughout the entire day three days a week, which meant when potty training began, I would also be on the front lines of making this happen. I began thinking of ways that might make it easier before the time came to start this venture.
One always finds his or her likes and dislikes regarding any given subject. I realized while training my own three boys that I did not like using pull ups as underwear while training them other than during the night when it was bedtime. My reason being that they hold to much liquid and are basically much like a fancy diaper. My mother-in-law had some old thick training underwear that she had saved when she trained my husband. I decided I liked those much more. Some kids do not like the feeling of wetness and if you are lucky to have one of those, your training may go much quicker than with the one that really is being strong willed and willing to go against you at all costs.
When I first started with my grand kids, I found it hard to find those thick underwear, but I finally was able to find some online. I will agree that using the pull ups can be less messy, but it can cause the process to be longer. I don’t like the process, therefore, quicker was better to and for me. When accidents happen, this will require you to do some cleaning. It sounds terrible, but just dump what is in the pants into the potty and flush. I have had days where I had to wash three or four small loads in one day and I’m sure Clorox loved this time of my journey. Sometimes you may have such a bad pair that you decide they just are not worth saving. I found my husband saying this from time to time. You WILL know when this may be the case for you.
Another thing I decided, and maybe it is because I have boys, was that I did not need to try this too soon. I found with all three of my boys that three years old seemed to be the best age. I also noticed that the first took longer than the other two. I think one main reason of that was they saw their older brother going already and were more motivated to learn how to be a “big boy”. With the grand kids, I also learned that the idea that girls train faster than boys is not always true. This is the first battle of a clashing of the wills that you will face with your child unless you happen to have a very easy going child.
Another thing I had to decide was what kind of potty would be used. Our existing one which would require me to lift him or her up, or a plastic one bought from the store which would be just their size. I have issues with my back, therefore I chose to buy one from the store. This also requires cleaning, but if you have flushable wipes, it really is not that bad. This was a good choice for me also because I liked the fact that as they progressed to not waiting for the alarm, they could go on ahead and start going in the potty which allowed me to finish a small task before having to go in there. It allowed for autonomy on their part in this process, which I believe is a great thing.
One of the main things a child has to learn while potty training is how to hold it until they are able to go to a bathroom. I started thinking about what I might could do to help reinforce this. One idea I came up with was to set an alarm on my phone. We did not have cell phones when my boys were little so I did not have this luxury but I wish I had. I started setting the alarm at twenty minutes at first and I told my grand child that when he heard the alarm that it would be time to go to the potty and not to go in his pants. If he had an accident before the twenty minutes then I decreased the time with the alarm. If he did not need to go, then I increased the time between alarms. I did this until there were no accidents (or at least very few) and I stuck with that time interval.
At first it was strange to him, but eventually he got to where he would stop as soon as he heard the alarm and he would go to the bathroom. It was a much easier process than it had been with my kids because the timing was not so haphazard and we all knew what the alarm meant. Over time he began telling me when he needed to go and I started increasing more time between the alarms. Depending on your child, there may come a time when you will need to have the conversation that he or she is doing well enough and that the alarm will not be used anymore.
Do not be surprised if after a short time your child, after being perfect for weeks in this, decides he or she does not want to stop and go to the bathroom. I have been through this six times, and every one of them made this decision. My oldest child would go number two in the potty every time, however, he would go hide behind the door right across from the bathroom to go number one. I’ve heard this is backward from most situations, but this was the truth for me. I had read that one should not spank a child for having an accident. In my case however, this was blatant rebellion and I spanked him on the bottom after warnings that I was going to if he did not go across the hall to the potty. After, the swat on the bottom, he never went behind the door again, but found the ability to walk across the hall to the bathroom. My conversation with him was that if he could walk behind the door every time to go number one, that he most assuredly could walk to the bathroom five steps away.
Teaching a child to consistently go number two is a little harder in most cases. These events are a lot less predictable and can be influenced by many different factors such as what had been on the menu the night before or even that day. I had an incentives program. The plastic potty I bought had stickers included in the box. Every time my grand baby went number one, he or she got to decorate his or her potty any way he or she wanted to. I bought extra stickers and they had a blast doing this. When he or she went number two, we put a penny, nickle, dime, or quarter into a glass that stayed on our kitchen cabinet. I told them that when they went for a whole month without an accident (number two), then we would take the change to HEB and pour it into the money counter and then he or she could pick out a toy with what they had gathered. Of course, we added a little to the amount but kept it below $20. They thought the whole process was great fun.
I don’t know if it was because I am older now and was successful prior with my own three boys, but it seemed easier with my grand kids than it did with my own kids. The alarm system really made things seem easier also because it was less of my harping and more of depending on the alarm. I have recently learned that I will be having a sixth grand child. This means I will be keeping four grands. I have already giggled at the thought that I will have another little human to potty train, but I know we will make it through it.
You may wonder why I chose this to write about. The reason I decided on this topic is because recently someone on social media asked for any suggestions regarding this ideas on how to go about it. I just knew the last three times had been easier on me, and I’m hoping something in this makes particular blog makes your venture in raising “big boys” and “big girls” a little easier on you!
SeasonedMomBlog 